9-11-01

Yesterday was sad. I don't really know how to put it in words. Maybe the memory of September 11th, 2001 defies words. So much destruction, so much sorrow, such tragedy. But the sadness I felt yesterday was more than just for the people who lost so much that day. My sadness was is for the America that we have lost since. The world, really.

I am a mother. And as a mother, I can say that the most distressing sound to me is the sound of my children fighting. I HATE it. Nothing makes me more upset, more discouraged or more like a failure as a parent.

I'm sure that as Heavenly Father watches (and has since Cain killed his brother) the contentions of His children, He has the right perspective on it. But it must be sad--even to Him. With His perfect knowledge of each of us and our parts in His plan, His perfect understanding of the impending outcome, His perfect dealings with all of His children. He will not remove our agency, and therefore He must watch as we bicker and fight amongst ourselves--as some choose evil and others suffer the effects of it. And it must make Him sad.

So, even with the knowledge that the Gospel of Jesus Christ gives me--an understanding that God is at the helm, that ultimately evil will be overcome and made to recompense it's destruction, and that The Lord Himselfwill return and govern His people with pure justice and righteousness--even with this knowledge, I am still sad. I feel as Mormon of old when he lamented the wickedness of his people, "O, ye fair ones."